i wish i had the words to accurately express the way i’m feeling. i’ve felt this way before. i remember it well. two years ago. in my basement. i said i felt like i was too big for this body. i feel it again. just eternally restless. incredibly bored. it sounds so stupid. is this ennui? my brother calls it The Great Midwestern Sadness. it’s so perfect. i’m not quite as sad as i was or as alone as i was, but just about as desperate for an exit strategy.